37 replies to this topic

[John]

I had such a great time last year hiking with Prof Hall, Malok, and Ranger Suzie. (For last year's report click here!)

I've wondered all year if anyone would show up to keep me company on this year's adventure. As a warm up hike, I decided to check out Estes Cone. I was at Long's Peak trailhead at 7 a.m. on August 29, a beautiful, cool morning. They actually have flushing toilets at the trailhead (I know RMNP plumbing) and as I headed into the men's room, I was quite shocked to see Misssilly standing in front of the mirror adjusting her stylish wool cap.

"Nice hat, Jen. So...what are you doing in the men's room?"
"Trying to pick up a hiking partner, of course. Want to hike to Estes Cone with me?"
"This is amazing! I am going there myself!"



We headed up the trail to a fork leading either to Longs Peak or Estes Cone. The trail is fairly level for a good while. We went by Eugenia Mine and Jen took my picture. Noticing the sign she said, "that reminds me of the Cardinals."
"You mean, 'more dreams than gold?'"
"Exactly. In fact I've decided to give up on the birds and root for the Astros." I was speechless.



The trail took us through Moore Park. Jen explained that President Bush's generous pro-environment policies and hefty budget for our national parks have allowed beautiful places like this to be created and preserved all over America. I figure she knows what she is talking about...she IS a student at a major university.



We finally got to the base of Estes Cone and had to tackle the very steep switchbacks. We gained about 700' in the last half mile and were huffing and puffing. The higher you get, the better the views of Longs Peak and Mt. Meeker.

[John]

We finally summitted around 10 a.m. and spent quite a bit of time exploring the peak area. Knowing that I do a lot of weddings, Jen picked my brain about how to meet the man of her dreams. "What I'm really looking for is a man to take care of."
"In what way?"
"You know, do his laundry, pick up his messes. I like the saying, 'How many men does it take to open a beer can? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.' I'm looking for a man who wants a submissive wife."
I suggested that she look for a strong leader type in a Methodist church as Baptist men tend to be hen-pecked.



We got back to the trailhead at 12:30 p.m., tired but exhilarated. Round trip we had covered 6.6 miles and gained 1,606' in elevation. It was the perfect warm up hike for my Lawn Lake adventure the next day. Would another forum friend show up to keep me company? Read on!

Day 2: Hike to Lawn Lake, Wednesday, August 30, 2006

I was up early to get ready for a two night stay at Lawn Lake. My backpack weighed about 40 pounds including my "luxury item," a beach chair. Funny how a 40 pound pack feels like it weighs 100 pounds. When Lawn Lake's earthen dam gave way in the early 1980's, the wall of water ripped a deep scar in the land and created the "alluvial fan" in Horseshoe Park. I'm fascinated by the flood damage as well as nature's power to rebuild. When I got to the trailhead just before 7 a.m., I was excited about returning to the place I camped four years ago. This time, however, I was hoping to summit some peaks in the Mummy Range. Just as I got my boot laces tied, I head a voice saying, "Joooohhhhhhnnnnn!!!!! Look, Dufus, it's Jooohhhhhhnnnnnn!!!!!" Standing there was the beautiful SandyP and her trusty husband Bill007 who was dressed in a tutu and handcuffs. I didn't even ask.


The first part of the trail is murderous. Switchbacks take you up 700' in the first mile. Then you walk along the river for a bit, followed by more switchbacks then back to the river and so on until you've walked 6.3 miles and gained 2,447' in elevation. As you get closer, Mummy Mountain comes into view. Sandy said it looked "AMMAAAAZZZZING!" and she was right!

[John]

The beautiful scenery helped keep my mind off of my aching back and oxygen deprived lungs. The aspens hadn't turned golden yet, but they were still pretty. Sandy said that for a mere five thousand dollars, she could buy "the perfect lenses to capture their beauty." When she said it, Bill nearly passed out.





After what seemed like FOREVER, we came to a sign that told us we were almost there. "So, you must have run into Ranger Suzie again, huh Bill?"
"I don't even want to talk about it," he said.
Sandy just glared.



Just before we got there Sandy noticed a beautiful spot that begged to be photographed. "I don't know how anybody can come here and not believe in God." Then glancing toward Bill she added, "or perhaps lead him to rededicate his life..."

[John]

Sandy helped me set up camp while Bill sat in his pink tights on a stump looking guilty. We got everything set up just in time to see the last moments of sun on Mummy mountain and a reflection of The Saddle in Lawn Lake. I never did find out what Bill did or how Sandy busted him out of jail. Perhaps another traffic accident? Cross dressing in public? Let anyone with theories come forward soon!





Day 3: Hike to Fairchild Mountain, August 31, 2006

"Psst. Hey, buddy!" The sound of a voice outside my tent startled me. My watch said it was 6 a.m. Could it be Ranger Suzie checking my camp permit? I unzipped my rain fly and stumbled outside, but not a soul was in sight. "Psst. Over here. It's Weatherbe!"
"Where are you? I can't see you."
"Nobody can see me because I'm not real. Whatdayasay we go hiking anyway?" The thought of hiking with an invisible man kind of freaked me out, but what else could I say? "Sure, just give me a minute to grab my daypack..."

Moments later I was walking up the trail toward The Saddle. It was eerie, hearing the sound of steps behind me but when I'd turn around nobody was there. Only the footfalls and the musky smell of a guy who hadn't showed in a few days reminded me that I was not alone.

"Hey Greg, how about I take a picture of you standing in front of Mt. Fairchild?" "Sure!" he replied.



Does vampire blood run in his veins?

We blew right by Crystal Lakes thinking that we'd catch a closer view on the way back down.

[John]

As soon as we cleared the lake area, we headed off trail directly toward Fairchild. We nearly stepped on a flock of Ptarmigan because they blend in so well with the rocks. Perhaps Weatherbe is part Ptarmigan?



As we gained elevation, we ran into some snow fields and I took my staff and did a little forum advertizing. "John, Marvman would be proud. Let me get a picture of that." The shadow was the best look I got of Weatherbe all day.



At the beginning of the day, I hoped to climb Fairchild, then Hague's Peak, then Mummy Mountain. But it was taking so long to scramble up the steep talus slope I knew I'd never have time to do it all. At the top of each section of rock, instead of finding the summit, there was another section yet to climb.



The view of Hague's Peak got better the higher we climbed.

[John]

Finally we were there. "How about I take your picture, John?"
"That would be great!"



"By the way, John, do you remember that last year Marvman sponsored a RMNP summit dance contest? If you'd like to enter, I'll shoot the video!" (Check out Marv's proposal right here.)

"Greg, you know that Baptists don't dance! But, why not? I'll give it a shot."

For a link to the video, click here!


"And I'll take your picture standing in front of Ypsilon Mountain, Greg."



We decided to make our own way down a relatively less steep part of the Fairchild cirque to Crystal Lake. The views of the lake were amazing.

[John]

As we descended, the clouds began to worry me. "What can you tell me about those, Mr. Weatherman?" I said.
"Let me just put it to you this way, my friend. If you don't get down to the lake by the time those clouds dump their load, you'll find out before me if Jesus was really the Messiah."



As quickly as I could, I scrambled down toward Crystal Lake. The going was slow because some of the rocks were very loose. I fell twice but avoided serious injury. Lightning flashed across the sky and I counted the seconds between the flash and the thunder to estimate the distance away. Even the blasts two miles away (10 seconds) made the ground shake underneath me. The blast ½ mile away really got my attention! I made it down and not a moment too soon. As soon as I reached the lake, the sleet started pounding down on me. Here's a link to a short video. Click here!

Although we made it safely to the lake, we were still above treeline. There is no path around the lake, so the task of boulder hopping was considerably more difficult than it would have been without the water and sleet. But with lighting still in the area, we moved as quickly as possible and made it to the trail that leads back down to Lawn Lake.



What an amazing adventure! The next day we hiked out. Here's to my forum friends and the ones I hope to hike with next year! God bless you all!

[misssilly]

Nice pictures John, but I will need to speak with your congregation: They CLEARLY aren't keeping you busy enough!

Jen

(Submissive? Astros? )

[bpv_UW]

Wow John. What a fantastic report. I laughed out loud more than once. And the pics were wonderul, as well. Thanks!

-Brandon

[Jenny]

Great reports John!! You are hilarious!!!!

--Jenny

[Lsmith]

Fantastic report and pictures John! Sorry there were no pics of Bill in his tutu!
Lori

[Bill 007]

Man you promised not a word about the tutu!
"Bill, not a word. I promise. If I mention your tutu, you have my permission to tell the world why I brought a multi-colored lawn chair with me to Lawn Lake!" That's what you said! Well, I'm a man of honor ( sort of ) and I'm not going to reveal your secret, no sir!

Bill
( I'm so embarrassed)

PS - Great pics of a great time. I really wish I could have been there!

[weatherbe]

Awesome report and pics John. I sure enjoyed hiking with you. Too bad you couldn't see me, but we sure had a great time ... Thanks so much for the story. I really enjoyed it!!

Weather

[PikesPeakDenise]

Excellent reading material over morning coffee!

[JDgreen]

Entertaining report and some very nice non midday photos!!